It’s so very difficult to go to bed early. I don’t mean like a kid on Christmas eve, more like the anxiety ridden waking nights where my mind is preoccupied with counting the number of my coffee fueled eye twitches. I hear there are many things I could do to drift off into blissful slumber, the chief of which would be a vigorous self spanking. However, that’s out of the question because I plan on marrying Christine O’Donnell.